Chapter 38
No matter how many times I had tried to prepare myself for this moment, I should have known that it wasn’t going to be easy
“Hey, cupcake. Mommy has something so important to do, so is it okay if you go on the carousel with Auntie Maya?” I asked my daughter who pouted.
“But Mommy.. I have been waiting for you to go on it together.” She frowned.
“And I’m so so sorry, but
“Go on
Julian interrupted me,
on the ride with her. We can talk when you two get down.” I gave him a grateful smile and nodded.
Sam and Maya walked over to him while I walked with Rosie towards the carousel. I was nervous. I knew what I was going to tell Rosic, but I didn’t know what I was going to do with him.
“Mommy, who is that man!” my little daughter asked me.
“Can Mommy answer this question later!” I said, picking her up. I gently placed her on one of the horses and carefully strapped her.
“Okay, but I think he is nice,” she said, making me umile.
“What made you think like that?” I titled my head to the side.
She shrugged. “He just seems to be.”
The ride soo
soon came to an end and the two of us walked towards Julian, Sam, and Maya. Luckily, Sam and Maya had taken her earlier to the park, so we didn’t have much longer.
Maya and Sam took Rosie and I turned to Julian. “I know that you have a million questions and whatever they are, I will answer them.”
“I don’t think that this is the right place, but.. I just want to know why. Why did you keep her away from me! Did you think that I was going to be a bad father? Is this because of what I had done to you?” Julian looked lost and in utter disbelief. My heart broke for the way he sounded.
“Not once had I thought that you would have been a bad father, but I needed to stay away from you and if I had told you about Rosic, you would have found your way back to my life,” I told him
“Rosie? Is that her name?” he asked, looking at her as she stuffed her mouth with pink cotton candy.
“I
“Her name is Rosalie and I call her either Rosie or cupcake because she loves them so much, I told him.
y mum?” There was a small smile on his lips. His mother’s actual name was Rosalind.
“After my
“It was a way of showing respect to your family. I never intended to keep her away for longer than that. I just needed more time before telling you and also telling them.” I couldn’t read his face. I didn’t know what he was thinking about. He didn’t say anything for a while and I patiently waited for him to grasp the bomb that had just been dropped. I looked down and saw how he was shaking one of his legs
“Julian, do you n
need some privacy? Would you like
e us to
to sit somewhere?” I asked him.
“I need to. This is hard. This is too much.” Was he having a panic attack? What was I supposed to do?
“Julian, what would you like me to do for you?” I placed my hand on his forearm. “Let’s just sit down for a minute, okay?” I tried to
to get him to move, but he wouldn’t budge.
“I need a moment,” he mumbled before moving away from me. I watched as he walked away and I wasn’t sure if I was supposed to follow him or
пог
“Leave him for a while, Maya said. I didn’t even feel her coming towards me.
“He doesn’t look okay, Maya,” I mumbled. I knew that keeping Rosie away from him was a mistake and it was selfish of me to prevent her from seeing her father for so long, but I needed to protect myself.
“And he’s not supposed to look okay. He has just found out that he has a daughter. How do you think he’s supposed to act?” She was right. His reaction was indeed normal.
it to me without inquiring
I got my phone out of my bag and quickly messaged Harper, asking her for Julian’s number. Of course, she didn’t give it to about the reason, but I told her that I was going to tell her later.
I planned on giving him one hour. No more than one hour. If he wasn’t back by then, I was going to call him. I needed to make sure that he was okay.
I walked over to my daughter, not wanting her to feel that something was wrong. The four of us went on the Ferris wheel and she seemed pretty
Chapter 39
When I found out that I was going to become a mother. I contemplated calling him, but the wounds were still so deep and I couldn’t find it in my heart to do that. Part of me wanted to punish him for what he had done to me. I thought about calling Rose or Haprer, but I knew that if I had told any of them, they would have told him.
Sam and Maya didn’t like the fact that I kept Rosie away from him for that long and they thought that I should have contacted him a couple of years ago. I was starting to wonder if they were right.
“Mommy, I’m tired. Can we leave!” Rosie mumbled as she looked up at me. She had been here for long.
“Let me just make a small phone call, then we can leave,” I told her and she nodded. The two of us sat down on a bench and I told Sam a go home. I needed to be alone with Julian.
and Maya to
I looked around and didn’t find him anywhere, so I called him, hoping he would answer, but he didn’t. I sent him a voice note on WhatsApp waited for five minutes. I looked down at Rosie and found her already asleep against me.
Luckily, Julian called me and I quickly picked up.
“Hey Julian, I was wondering if you’d like to join Rosic and me for dinner tonight to properly talk,” I asked him.
“Okay. Send me the location and I will be there by 6:30. Is that alright?” I nodded, then I realized that he couldn’t see me.
and
“Yes, that would be great. See you.” I hung up and picked up my little girl then made my way to my car. Tonight was about to be full of surprises for her and I silently prayed that she would take it well.
